Thursday 1 August 2013

Message to friends

I loved this extract from a piece written by Nigel Dudley in The Telegraph.  He'd lost his 22 year old son - just suddenly .  No reason - pure fate.  

Here's the quote:

"For example, our neighbours would bring us food, hand it over and make to leave. How could they know that the last thing we wanted was to be left alone? So we had a rule. We told people:

 "We talk a lot, we cry a lot and we drink a lot. Come and join us."

I love company and I adore my friends.  I agree that being left alone to grieve is the last thing in the world I want.  I'd much rather inflict my, often very miserable, self on others :)  

I definitely agree with advice to not isolate yourself if you are grieving.  People are desperate to help.  I know I want to help others.  But people just don't know what to do.  They need directing.  

Nobody knows what's around the corner and life has proved to me how hideously unfair it is.  I hope I can give back to others the love and care my family has received during Chloe's illness and after her death. People can be very good indeed.  One of the very few good things to come from this, I hope, is that I am far more compassionate than I ever.  Actually, dare I say, I like myself better now; it's the injustice of the world I'm not so keen on. 

Anyway I love all my friends and family (and that includes my young friends and "adopted daughters" I've stolen from Chloe)  dearly and I will do anything I can for you.  Sorry I'm a miserable mess at the moment; but I'm working hard at it and I care about you all very much.  

Bottle of wine or two here every Friday night .....

Love you Chloe Jane Drury - xxxxxxxxxxxx

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